The Best Loan Ever!

I don't even know where to begin . . .

Please excuse me if my thoughts are random and everywhere.
Sometimes I have so many things flying around my head,
I just got to get them out and written down before they go away.

So much tragedy has been around me lately.

It seems everywhere I turn,

Someone is losing a child.

I have heard of three separate instances in the last week.

I never even seriously considered the possibility that I could lose a child,

Until this past week.

Yes, I have feared it in the past.

But it was one of those fears that I told myself was ridiculous, and that it would never happen.

But the reality hit me this week,

That it could happen.

 

I had recently been convicted to relinquish my "control" over their lives

And give it to God.

They are His children anyway.

They are just on loan to me.
That was hard.
I'm somewhat of a control freak sometimes.

 

I am not talking about:

Not protecting them,

Not guiding them,

Not keeping them away from harm.

 

I am talking about

God is in control,

He is going to do what He is going to do,

And I just gotta do my best to raise them to be

God-fearing,

Respectful,

Obedient,

Loving adults.

 

I'm not naïve.

I can't even imagine what life would be like without one of my kids.

I don't know how I'd react.

I don't know how I'd cope.

I really don't know what I would do.

And I don't pretend to know these things.

 

I've watched friends lose their children.

My heart ached for them.

I cried for them.

I grieved with them.

But I don't know what they've been through.

I've only observed as an outsider.

 

I have been convicted over the last couple weeks to

Love on my children more.

Listen to them more.

Play with them more.

Laugh with them more.

Spend time with them more.

 

Time is fleeting.

One day (Lord willing), they will be all grown up.

It already is amazing to me that my first born is going into 7th grade next school year.

Didn't I just have him a year ago???

 

They are the best gifts from God.

I count myself blessed to be able to raise them.

It is an honor that God bestowed these 4 precious gifts on my husband and me.

May I never take them for granted

(as I often do).

May they follow after God with all their heart, soul & mind.

May they love Him,

Obey Him,

And keep His commands.

Both the Old & New Testaments speak of this.

 

Deuteronomy 30:9-10 NKJV

The Lord your God will make you abound in all the work of your hand,

in the fruit of your body, in the increase of your livestock,

And in the produce of your land for good.

For the Lord will again rejoice over you for good as he rejoiced over your fathers,

if you obey the voice of the Lord your God, to keep His commandments and His statutes which are written in this Book of Law, and if you turn to the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul.
 

  Matthew 22:36-39 NKJV
"Teacher, which is the great commandment in the law?"
Jesus said to him, "You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, with all your soul, and with all your mind.  This is the first and great commandment.  And the second is like it: You shall love your neighbor as yourself."

And as I've been thinking about my children,
Relishing in the memories of all the fun we've had.
I've also remembered all the times they had deliberately disobeyed,
threw temper tantrums, were fighting, whining, complaining, etc.
The following thought continued to press on my heart then and still does today:
Children are a blessing,
not a curse or burden.
(no matter how bad they're throwing that temper tantrum!)
;)

It seems to me that the world sees them as a burden. 

Often when I'm out in public,
I get the exact same comment from many different people:

"Wow! You have your hands full!"
From that statement, you'd assume my kids were swinging from the rafters at the grocery store,
or running around wildly knocking things off of the shelf, opening boxes of food, and rapidly consuming the contents.
But no, on every occasion, they were standing quietly holding on to the grocery cart.
And I always reply,

"It is a good full.  And I wouldn't have it any other way."

 

Psalm 127:3-5a NKJV

Behold, children are a heritage from the Lord,

The fruit of the womb is a reward.

Like arrows in the hand of a warrior,

So are the children of one's youth.

Happy is the man who has his quiver full of them.

I hope this post has been an encouragement to your heart.
These verses have been to me.
We just came out of a "Heart & Home" conference at our church,
where I was convicted on many fronts where I could be a better mother;
A better steward of my loan children.

I am not perfect.
My kids are not perfect.
But I am so thankful that I serve a perfect God,
who loves my family and me despite of our downfalls.
And I am so thankful that He has put these four kids on loan for Matt and I to care for!!

Children are a heritage from the Lord,
The fruit of the womb is a reward.
Ps 127:3